An Open Letter To The Pet Shop Boys or How Can You Expect To Be Taken Seriously?

Dear Neil and Chris,

The ticket I purchased to your upcoming performance in Seattle has just arrived!  It’s been forever since I’ve seen a Pet Shop Boys show; in fact it was on the stunning “Performance” tour.  The stage direction, the costumes, the amazing cast of dancers and back up singers was something I have not seen before or since in a live pop music performance.  It was, and still is the best live show I’ve ever seen.  Needless to say, I was excited to be a VIP for your new Pandemonium tour -albeit I had to pay to be a VIP which is something I’m not used to.  There were no seats together for the VIP tickets, but I figured that it would be fun to meet new people who might also have attended the “private VIP pre-show”, so I went a head and purchased one.

I mean a chance to meet the Pet Shop Boys in a private location on the day of the show in a location to be determined?  A cool laminate pass?  A chance to have said cool laminate VIP pass autographed by you?  No photographs allowed?  All for a price which I won’t name here because anyone else reading probably thinks I’m already an idiot.  But boys, I think there’s a bigger problem here.  This is going to be a little tough, but I think you can handle it.

For the price I paid, I feel like the agency you hired could have been more forthcoming with the rules and regulations of the meet and greet.  These “guidelines” arrived after I purchased the ticket, not before.  These instructions are a list of things I can and cannot do, where to be and at what time etc.  There are so many demands being put on me, the fan – and I thought I was the VIP here!  The whole thing sounds like a bigger disaster than Los Angeles, but since I paid an insane amount for what you refer to as an “opportunity”, I may as well go.  I’ll probably be the one observing and not really saying much if you want to come and say hello.

I’m sure you’ll never read this, so I’ll add one more thing.  It seems that this meet and greet is a way for you to get around promoters who are another factor in the jacked up price for your ticket – they are scoundrels, at best.  But your fans are already snatching up $35 T-shirts, $20 programmes and $70 hoodies already, how much more do you really need?  A moderate fan could spend up to half of their months rent to go to your one of your concerts!  Add up the price of a couple of tickets, swag, dinner and drinks for two plus transportation costs and you’ll have an idea of what you’re fans are doing for YOU.  I’d hate to know what your crazy rabid fans spend on all of this!  I have to ask the obvious question here – How can you expect to be taken seriously?  There isn’t a solution for any of this and I admit that this was my choice, but I still feel a little tricked. 

Nine Inch Nails and Jane’s Addiction (neither of whom I really enjoy, but strangely respect) recently had a series of meet and greets and nice dinners for fans who paid a crazy amount of money to attend.  The difference between you and them is that they donated the proceeds to a very sick fan who needed a heart transplant.  It is my belief that celebrities who have more than enough should use their popularity to do these kinds of things for their fans and their communities.

Which brings me to somewhat of a challenge.  Short, sweet and to the point.  I’d like to openly ask you to consider a small donation to a local charity when you visit Seattle.  If you’d like some suggestions, feel free to find me at your meet and greet or e-mail me through our weblog!  It would be great to see a little less taking and more giving, don’t you think?

That wasn’t so painful, was it? 

All this other crap aside, I am very excited to see your show this coming Sunday.  I can’t wait to see what you have in store for your fans.  Oh, and I totally want to hear “It’s Alright”, okay?

— Phil

Pet Shop Boys play Seattle’s Moore Theatre Sunday 20th September, 2009.